Last modified on May 26th, 2020
Women and OrgasmsOrgasm lasts for a few seconds, normally not over ten. After that, the individual enters the resolution phase, which is the return to a normal or subnormal physiological state. Generally, men return to normal and become unresponsive to further stimulation. They cannot begin to build up another excitement phase until some period of time has elapsed.However, women, with continued stimulation are physically capable of repeated orgasms. They can achieve this without the intervening “rest period” required by men. This makes women totally multi-orgasmic beings.There is really nothing stopping a woman from having an orgasm in the absence of any medical reason. She readily achieve this once there are no environmental and psychological obstacles. Some of these obstacles can include communication problems, inhibitions, wrong moods and settings.Other issues such as inexperience, fear of letting go, depression, and stress can also affect her ability to achieve an orgasm. Once these are taken out of the equation, she’s entitled and should be on her way to a life of full orgasmic pleasure.
Remove orgasm inhibitorsThe key to having great orgasms for a woman is to let go of any inhibitions, free her mind and give herself permission to enjoy the entire sexual experience leading and up to orgasm. There is the need for her to challenge most of her beliefs about sex and let go of those causing inhibitions.She should also be more comfortable with both masturbation (privately and before her partner) and receiving oral and manual stimulation from her partner. There is also need for freedom in entertaining sexual thoughts and fantasies and a stop to feeling embarrassed when asking for what she needs sexually or when engaging in self-pleasuring during lovemaking.
Lubrication and ForeplayAdequate lubrication is very necessary if she is to get fully aroused for sexual intercourse. It helps to increase the comfort and speed of vagina penetration and friction against her clitoris. More arousal can be achieved by engaging in foreplay especially receiving oral stimulation of the vaginal by her partner. A lot of women also adore receiving oral sex and some claim that they cannot climax unless a man “goes down” on them. She needs to also explore sensate focus.
Relax and Defocus on OrgasmRecent studies show that in order for a woman to achieve orgasm, the part of her brain associated with stress, emotion, and anxiety has to shut down. This is so because an orgasm is both a psychological and physical experience.A woman should learn how to relax more. She does not need to put too much pressure on herself about reaching orgasm. She has to realize that sex is not primarily about orgasm. This is very important because of the effect of her being too desperately focused on achieving one.With such state of mind, she runs a very high risk of excluding herself out of the entire sexual pleasures. Unfortunately, she might even miss out on the desired orgasm itself. There is therefore a great need for her to stay relaxed. She has to learn to let herself loose, while trying to focus on and enjoy every sensation she is receiving.
Sex positions providing direct clitoral stimulationThe major reason while most women do not achieve orgasm is because of the lack of adequate stimulation of the clitoris. Biologically, the female clitoris (with its eight thousand nerve endings – twice as many as the penis), is analogous to the male penis and is the part of women that would have turned into a penis had they developed as males.It would therefore seem unfair to ask a woman to have an orgasm without direct stimulation or contact to the clitoris. Just as it would be an uneasy task for a man to have an orgasm without direct stimulation or contact to his penis, women’s clitoris should not be treated any less.Without mincing words, stimulation of the clitoris is very essential for a woman in achieving orgasms through sexual intercourse. However, it is not all sexual positions that can lead her to orgasm.Therefore, it is important for her to experiment with positions that provide her and her partner more direct clitoral and vaginal stimulation during intercourse to increase her chances of having an orgasm.
Woman-on_TopOne of the favorite positions for most women in reaching an orgasm is the woman-on-top position with her facing or backing her partner. This position provides her an opportunity to control the rhythm and movement, angle, degree of clitoral pressure, and depth of penetration to suit herself perfectly.While in this position, either her or her partner can use one or more fingers to stimulate her clitoris. While facing the man in this position, the man can heighten the clitoral stimulation by propping himself up on his elbows, thus placing his abdomen in closer contact with her clitoris.
Rear-EntryRear-entry position, whereby the man enters from behind, while a woman is on her hands and knees (or elbows), is another favorite sex position for female orgasm. In this position, her partner can reach around and use his fingers to stimulate her clitoris or she can pleasure herself by stimulating her clitoris. Rear-entry also allows for deep penetration and stimulation of the cervix.
Missionary StyleThe man-on-top (missionary style), also provides access for stimulation of the clitoris. She or her partner can easily reach and use their fingers to stimulate her clitoris effectively. To enhance the stimulation, little modifications can be made with some pillows put under her buttocks.Also if her legs are up on her partner’s shoulders or her knees bent towards her chest. The man can also prop himself forward, so that every time he thrusts, his penis rubs against her clitoris.
Exercise for Increased Vaginal Muscle TensionThe body needs regular exercise to help it maintain muscle control and strength. Frequent exercise also helps the skin and nerve endings remain in good working order as it also improves blood circulation around the body. Most especially, she will need to exercise the vagina to prevent it from losing its elasticity and strength.
Kegel ExercisesKegel exercise is one the easiest ways to heighten her orgasm as it helps in tightening her pelvic muscles and strengthening of her pelvic floor.She can perform kegel exercises by tensing her pelvic floor as if she were stopping and starting her urination. Tightening and releasing the muscles, off and on while she increases the amount of time they are tensed. She needs to indulge herself in regular kegel exercises throughout her day.During intercourse, she can practice kegel exercises against a resistant device for a firmer grip providing more friction, while her partner gets pleasure and enjoyment from the stimulation of the penis by the PC muscle and both watch out for those orgasmic pleasures.
Self DiscoveryLots of women today still feel very inhibited about self-love. Masturbation should be seen as totally healthy and considered as one sure way for her to learn just exactly what pressures and ways of touching herself, that are capable of triggering more excitement than others.She will also need to explore her body in order to find out precisely how to stimulate her clitoris, and how to get herself to orgasm when she is alone. By following the cues her body is giving and by the time she has become more confident of sure ways of bringing herself to orgasm, she can then try incorporating some of them during intercourse showing her partner what works.
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